lol fuck off
1. fake flowers in a shopping cart in a wal mart somewhere outside of northern alabama. crutches, the things you thought you knew. you didn’t know anything.
2. girls, young and coated with dirt, riding in a suburban with a friends grandmother. that year we felt more free than we ever had & theyve surpassed me.]
3. from years of shaky experience ive learned that the only way to treat a wound is to leave it hidden, untreated, until the scabs peel away and the fresh, pink skin begins to show.
4. mitigate whatever damage your pain could do on your family by tucking it away neatly in drawers next to old steak knives and letters you never responded to but promised you would but thought they were stupid because texting exists.
5. eat entire living things at barbeques with families of friends you’ve never met before. bring in the amish potato salad.
6. pause your hunger to write a fucking poem.
7. eat because you know youre not worth the trouble of starvation
8. now, 18, shaky, and indeterminate, you dont need anybodys grandmother to drive you around.
9. infantile attempt to exit, to repair. to whatever sense this did or didn’t make. to whatever febrile attempt at solace any sort of words couldnt make up for & for the pack you smoked for me & for the one you didnt.